Pet posts have the easiest audience on Instagram and the laziest captions. The photo is already doing the work, so the caption’s only job is to add a personality the picture cannot show: what the animal did ten seconds earlier, what they are clearly thinking, what they destroyed.
The two-line fold matters here too. Write the joke first and the context second, or write no context at all.
Funny
- He has no thoughts and I envy him.
- Paid rent on this house for six years, she owns it.
- Every day is the best day, apparently.
- Sat on my laptop during a meeting. No notes from him.
- She heard the fridge open from another postcode.
- He is not spoiled, he is well informed about his rights.
- I said no. He negotiated.
- Barked at a leaf. Won.
- Emotional support disaster.
- The bin was closed. I promise it was closed.
Sweet and sentimental
- Best decision I have made.
- She follows me room to room and I let her.
- He was scared of everything for a month. Look at him now.
- Somehow the calmest part of my day.
- I talk to him more than most people.
- She waits by the door and I never deserve it.
- Twelve years and still my shadow.
- Small animal, large role.
Cats
- Acknowledged me for four seconds. Big day.
- She sleeps eighteen hours and is still tired.
- Knocked it off the table while looking at me.
- Sits in the one box I need.
- Affection on her schedule, never mine.
- He waits until I sit down to need something.
- Loud at 4am for absolutely no reason.
- The chair is hers now.
Dogs
- Walked four miles, slept for nine hours.
- Every stick is the best stick.
- She thinks the vet is a party.
- He learned sit in a day and recall never.
- Wet, sandy, delighted.
- Would follow me into traffic, which is why we practice.
- Two speeds: full and off.
Adoption day and gotcha day
- Two years since the shelter got the call.
- Best five minutes I ever spent filling in a form.
- She hid under the sofa for a week. Now she sits on it.
- Adopted, and honestly he rescued the schedule.
- Anniversary of the day the house got louder.
- I went to look. Obviously I did not just look.
- One year since the drive home.
Short one-liners
- My whole heart, with fur.
- Good boy. Confirmed.
- Menace. Beloved.
- Chief napping officer.
- Small and in charge.
- The reason I go outside.
- Pure chaos, well loved.
- Roommate, permanent.
- Better than most people.
- Never once let me down.
Vet trips and the difficult days
- Vet said he is fine and dramatically overweight.
- Twelve years old and cleared for another year.
- She hated every second and forgave me by the car park.
- Annual jabs, annual sulking.
- Waited three hours and he behaved better than I did.
- Good news, expensive news, both at once.
How to pick one
The photo already shows that your pet is cute, so do not caption it cute. Caption the behavior. “Barked at a leaf. Won.” works because it is a story with a beginning and an end in six words, and it matches what the picture is showing rather than repeating it. Front-load the funny part, because the setup is what gets folded away. Keep the animal’s voice consistent if you use one, since accounts that give a pet a personality do better than accounts that describe the pet from the outside. Only ask a question you will reply to, because pet posts get a lot of comments and answering them is most of what builds the account. Use the instagram character counter to check the line fits before the fold.
If you post the same dog every week and keep running dry, the Instagram post generator will give you angles you have not used yet.